What is Domi?

Before I get to explaining what exactly Domi is, please read my other blog titled Dating Scene in Korea and Koreatown. If nothing else, at least read about or understand the Booking concept, this will offer a point of reference that might help better explain how domi service got it's start.

The literal translation of domi is "helper". Once upon a time, struggling bars and nightclubs in Korea understood that if they had more girls, more guys would come patronize their bars. So they began to hire domis or helpers to come hang out and create a more sought after environment for male customers.

Fast forward to 2010, many of the Korean communities in America now offer domi. A group of guys can walk into a noraebang (literal translation: song room), basically a semi private karaoke bar for your group of friends, and request that domis be sent over. If the guy doesn't like the first domi he sees, he can pass and wait for another to be introduced. He can continue to do this until he finds a girl he likes or probably runs out of new girls to meet. This actually spawned off the original concept of "booking" and if you've read my other blog you can probably see the similarities. Now here is the big difference, the male customer pays the girls to come hang out. Instead of the girl floating from table to table for free liquor in the "booking" concept, the girl and the company she works for will charge an hourly rate, usually about $60 per hour. The girl will usually be paid an hourly plus earn tips. Just like "booking", there is no expectation of "hooking up" or any of the sort. Basically the girls role is to be a fun partner to hang out with. Girls will usually sing, dance, and talk with the guy. They tend to be much friendlier then in the booking concept because now they are getting paid per hour and it's in their best interest to be able to extend that hour into multiple hours. Not a bad gig for some of the girls, basically getting paid to hang out and play. Ironically, my girlfriends that have worked as domis seem to make more money then the guys hiring them.

The guys like it because it is now a more comfortable and intimate setting. You're not in the middle of a packed nightclub with music blaring. You actually have an opportunity to talk with and get to know the girl. In this situation it's safe to say the girl will be quite friendly and receptive because now I am paying her. The men tend to like the fact that there is no rejection and they get an opportunity to hang out with a girl that's normally out of his league. Now I'm not stupid, I understand most of these guys want nothing more than to be able to take the girl home but that is really no different then going to a bar with your girl friends and having every guy there trying to do the same. I do understand that many people find it odd to essentially be paying for company.  I understand that paying for sexual company is not only immoral but illegal. Here these guys are paying to hang out, and that is it. Not very different than going to a pretty bartender and tipping her well for an opportunity to hang out with her. Hooters is pretty much built on this business model, hire pretty girls to talk to guys and keep them company. Let these guys dream for a minute. Let them dream the dream where then can party with beautiful women like in the music videos.

A lot of people have trouble grasping this domi concept so I will do my best to clear up some of those misconceptions. I understand that it might look weird to see a bunch of pretty Asian girls constantly walking in and out of bars in large groups. I've noticed many non-Korean people witness this and make assumptions or judgments. That being said the popular Vegas clubs do pretty much the same thing, prancing girls in and out of the VIP area, except in this case the girls don't get a thing but an opportunity to meet a guy that may or may not be wealthy.

Perhaps it is the payment that makes some people uneasy. Is this really very different than the current American dating service or internet dating scene? Generally men pay quite a bit of money for an opportunity (for which most men fail at) to meet women. Women often can join for free or even get some sort of sign up bonus. The cost for the women being subsidized by the the paying men. From there, if you go on a date, it is generally assumed that the man would pay. In both situations, the man is paying quite a bit for an opportunity to meet and hang out with a woman. Similarly for the woman, she is compensated for the meeting whether it be via cash or free food, drinks, and subsidized access to online dating or dating services.

For my equal rights warriors, I would like to point out there is a male version of this as well. Girls can also request a group of guys to be sent over where the girls can now choose a guy that they would like to spend some time with. I personally have never tried it but I've heard it can be really fun.

Be sure to read my blog about Korean Drinking Etiquette here:
http://koreandrinking.blogspot.com/

Be sure to join our latest addition in Hawaii:
Facebook Domi Hawaii